In case you’re at that age when ‘feeling the Christmas spirit’ isn’t as easy as it used to be, here’s a quick little cure: suffocate yourself in Christmas. More specifically: the campiest, snowflake (iest) Christmas films that Netflix has to offer. These movies aren’t classics by any means, but they bleed so much yuletide cheer that they’re guaranteed to get you in the mood for the holidays quicker than you can say: ‘ho ho ho!’
“Christmas with a View”
Reality TV chef takes a job at a small resort town and falls for failed restaurateur turned manager in the process. Replete with snow, gems, and dinner plates that look like they’ve been plucked from Pinterest, and two leads that look more like brother and sister than couple to be. The only saving grace of this movie: Vivica Fox.
“Christmas Wedding Planner”
… more like first time wedding planner! Quirky lead plans her first big day for her meant to be ‘ethereal’ rich girl cousin, and encounters obstacles that range from Mrs. Van Der Woodsen (Kelly Rutherford, playing an even smaller screen version of her well known role), to her cousin’s former lover turned private investigator. A wedding is planned, chaos ensues, Joey Fatone appears… and the movie pays some sick tribute to Kelly Rutherford’s Gossip Girl past with revelations that end up becoming more hilarious rather than scandalous.
Yes, you read that right. That’s a real movie. Gorgeous, engaged, blonde writer turned ‘PR manager’ to her stereotype of a fiance shares an (unnecessary) elevator kiss with cute baker boy that looks like he could belong in an early 2000’s romantic comedy. Plot plants a world of issues between engaged couple that bloom into eventual separation, and well– cute moments ensue. Saving grace of this weird bake-y film? Dogs. Lots of them!
“The Spirit of Christmas”
I expected horror. What I got was a weird hipster, a single lawyer, and an hour long episode of budget CSI. This was one of those movies that crossed the line from cute yuletide film to ‘so bad its not good but terrible’.
“The Princess Switch”
Well known more for Vanessa Hudgens than anything else. Ah yes, an actual cutesy film that manages to make a semblance of sense. If you’re still in the mood for a film that makes sense despite a holiday hangover, then this is the one. Unfortunately it isn’t immune from some cringe-y bits: an example being Hudgens’ atrocious attempt at a British accent.
“A Christmas Prince”
This was apparently one of Netflix’s big hits when it came out Christmas of last year, and I honestly do not see why. First of all, it seems like someone stole the lead’s personality and switched it with a robot. Second of all… there’s just nothing likable about her. The prince is given the standard ‘playboy but actually guy with heart of gold’, and there’s just nothing more to him. His sister is a unique personality (forget her condition, she’s a royal hacker!), but that’s about it. If you’re not in the mood to digest a world of trash, then I suggest googling this film and finding one of many spoiler heavy articles that summarize “A Christmas Prince” in gifs and pixelated screenshots– it’ll do.
“A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding”
I’ll save you the time (and the brain cells): it didn’t get any better. It got worse.